Only in Britain will you get a story like this: Queen orders flu fortress.
The Queen is having a giant henhouse built at Balmoral to help protect her chickens from bird flu.
Yesterday staff at the Scottish retreat were constructing a chalet-style building and a 7ft fence after the UK's first case of the lethal H5N1 strain was found in a dead swan.
The story goes on to say that Balmoral is 60 miles from Cellardyke, where the dead swan was found, and "just a few miles" outside the zone declared around Cellardyke.
The British tabloids will be ecstatic at a royal angle to the avian-flu story.