(In the heady days of the dot-com bubble, I had a great job writing columns for an e-zine now sadly defunct...but until recently, the columns were still online. Now they seem to have vanished, so I'm republishing some of them here.)
I'm still learning the names of the students in my classes this semester, and the other day I called one of them "Katie." A split second later I learned it was Kate, thank you very much.
Well, I understood her perfectly. Blessed as I am with the name Crawford, I've endured half a century of "Crawfish" from would-be wits, not to mention the well-meaning folks who put an extra "l" in "Kilian." (The profligate Irish Killians may need it, but we frugal Germans make do with just one.)
We often bristle when people mess with our names or patronize us, a reaction predicted by Kilian's First Law: People care more about communicating their identity than about communicating anything else. This is why scientists write scientific jargon, why business people write such "businesslike" prose, and why postmodern literary critics are unintelligible. Your language is a major part of your identity, so you cling to it even when you know you may baffle or outrage your readers and listeners.
We Webwriters need to get beyond that attitude. We hope to deliver good, solid jolts to our visitors, but not to drive them away. Terms that seem perfectly harmless to us may be deeply offensive to people who come to our site, and they'll rarely stick around long enough to tell us what we did wrong.
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